Sunday, 30 December 2012

What 2012 has taught me: Idea from Hannahjustyne

Hello lovely's,
I saw this post on 'hannahjustyne's' blog, and thought it was a good idea so decided i wanted to do it :) some of it is quite down and in the dumps, but it ends positive, i promise :)

So this year started very shitty. I managed to lock my knee, resulting in me needing an operation on it and me not being able to do alot for a couple of months. Within the first week of 2012, i was at what i thought was my all time low, something happened and in the spurr of the moment took an overdose. It was the most selfish thing i had ever done, i didn't think about anyone else at the time, it was the scariest moment of my life and i couldn't believe i had done it. I was fine and i would never try that ever again, but the fact that i had felt low enough in myself to feel that was the only thing to do, must mean i was in a pretty bad place. I found the course i wanted to do, and everything was going against me being able to get on it, money etc.. There was nothing else in the world i wanted to do, or could do.

So i quit my job at clintons in the summer and attempted to move to magaluf, i lasted 2 and a half weeks and didn't particularly enjoy myself, so i gave up and came home. I might have given up, but when i think back, i must have been a pretty strong person to just have the guts to move abroad, on my own. I did the whole airport thing on my own which to me was a massive achievement!

When i came back from magaluf, i still wasn't sure if i was going to be able to get on the course, and i became heavily depressed, but come september, i finally made it onto the course, and because i was that happy i was doing what i want to do for the rest of my life, i overcame my depression, and i can now pretty much completely ignore any bad thoughts that come into my head, which considering i've had depression hanging over me since i was around 15, this is amazing.

My course is going well, but then my mum fell ill, and she's been in and out of hospital which has been very hard, but i've stayed strong for her, and funnily enough, this happening to her has brought me, my mum and my dad alot closer together, so every cloud has a silver lining. Not only was my mum in hospital, my grandma then broke her leg, which made everything harder but as a family we pulled through.

If 2012 has taught me anything, it's that i am a very very ambitious young woman and i am deffinately strong minded and i've learnt to make decisions and stick to my gut instinct. 2012 has been shitty, but i'm starting the year of 2013 in a sparkley dress, and full of alcohol, so bring it on!!

I have so much to look forward too this coming year, and i can't wait.
Please post if you've done this post too, i would love to know how 2012 has been for you.
Love Louisa

1 comment:

  1. Not only are you ambitious but you're are very inspiring too. Many people don't have the courage to do what you have done and the fact that you are able to speak about the down sides when others stay silent is amazing. I really hope 2013 is a brilliant year for you!!

    Just Smile.